How Your Perfectionism Is Actually Hurting You

People tend to see perfectionism in different ways. On one hand, it can be viewed as a good thing. Maybe you just like things done correctly, and you push yourself to be your best. 

Unfortunately, many perfectionists take that idea too far. There’s a big difference between doing your best and feeling like no matter what you do, it’s never good enough. 

Real perfectionism can end up controlling everything you do. It can hinder your productivity, negatively impact your relationships, and even damage your self-esteem and confidence. 

Whether you consider yourself a perfectionist or not, it’s important to know how it could hurt you, and what you can do to be your best without crossing that potentially harmful line. 

It’s Causing You to Procrastinate

Most people think perfectionists get everything done on time and that every project, assignment, and contribution is done, well - perfectly!

Unfortunately, that isn’t always the case. 

When you’re so caught up in something being perfect, you might procrastinate or put it off because you’re so worried about the quality. The reality is, no matter how badly you want to be perfect, no one is. Recognizing that whatever you turn in might not meet your unrealistic expectations will make you put it off until the last minute. 

Of course, procrastination often leads to rushing through things. So, you might not complete your project with the quality you want. 

That leads to a vicious cycle. The more you procrastinate, the more your productivity suffers. The more your productivity suffers, the harder you’ll end up being on yourself. 

It’s Impacting Your Health

Constantly focusing on perfection can cause a lot of excess stress in your life. 

That kind of stress often leads to anxiety and depression, contributing to physical symptoms like

• Sleep issues

• Changes in eating habits

• Digestive problems

• Headaches

• Muscle aches/pains

These symptoms can also be cyclical. For example, the more worried you are about being perfect, the harder it will be to get a good night’s rest. The less sleep you get, the more fuel your brain will create for conditions like anxiety and depression. 

It’s Damaging Your Self-Esteem

No matter how much you might want to be perfect, it’s not possible. Perfectionism can cause you to create unrealistic expectations for yourself – and others. 

Unfortunately, when you end up not meeting those expectations, it can take a toll on your self-esteem. You might end up believing negative self-talk and questioning your worth. While that can drive you to be even more of a perfectionist, it will end up doing more damage to your confidence along the way. 

It’s Affecting Your Relationships

It’s important to understand that your perfectionism impacts more than just you. 

When your idea of perfectionism extends beyond what you do, you might develop unrealistic expectations for others in your life. That can include co-workers, romantic partners, friends, and family members. When they don’t live up to those expectations, you might “blow up” on them or criticize them. 

Alternatively, you might become incredibly defensive against anyone who calls out your imperfections. Even if it’s a co-worker offering constructive criticism, it can be hard to hear and accept when you have unrealistic standards. 

As you can see, perfectionism isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. Crossing that line of “doing your best” can be harmful to your mental and physical health, as well as your personal and professional lives. 

If you think your perfectionism or anxiety is causing problems in your life, there are things you can do to let it go! Feel free to contact me for more information, or to set up an appointment. Together, we’ll go over skills that can help you manage your expectations, and lead a perfectly imperfect life.