Tips for Communicating Effectively as a Family

It can seem like some families just “click” when it comes to communication. Everyone is open and honest and has no problems showing vulnerability. But that is not the case for everyone.

Family communication does not always come naturally. Personalities can be a factor, as well as family history or simply the dynamic everyone grew up with, but ignoring communication issues within your family will only make matters worse. It is important to be able to communicate with each other in healthy, effective ways that will carry on to the next generation.

With that in mind, here are some tips you can use to communicate effectively as a family so you can start putting them into practice right away.

Be an Active Listener

Communication is a two-way street. While being able to talk about your feelings and needs is important, it is just as essential to be a good listener.

Listening and hearing are two different things. To be an active listener, eliminate distractions when a family member is trying to talk to you. Give them the time and space they need to express themselves, and make sure your attention is on them.

Use verbal and nonverbal cues to let them know that you are listening. Ask questions and repeat statements as needed. This kind of listening will help that person feel understood and valued. Not only will it improve communication, but it will make them more likely to be an active listener when you speak, too.

Use “I” Statements

It can be easy to play the blame game in relationships — including familial ones, but even if a family member is hurting or challenging you in some way, try to avoid pointing fingers.

Instead of suggesting that they are in the wrong, use “I” statements to let them know how you feel about the issue. Chances are, your family is not trying to hurt you or cause problems on purpose. When they know how things are affecting you, the negative actions are more likely to stop.

Shift Perspective

One of the great things about families is that they are made up of many different personalities. Of course, that can also be what causes everyone to clash sometimes.

Empathy is an important communication tool, especially when it comes to dealing with family members. Try to shift your perspective and think about how other family members might be thinking or feeling. When you acknowledge those feelings, you can respond with compassion and respect.

Individual Communication Styles

You are not always going to have big family meetings with everyone involved. While it can be great to get multiple people together as often as possible, most of your interactions with family members will probably be one-on-one.

So, try to learn and understand everyone’s different communication styles. Everyone has unique needs and feelings. By focusing on those things while communicating with one person at a time, you can adjust your own communication style to meet those needs. Doing so is likely to result in a better, more open experience for all parties during every conversation.

Reach Out for Help

Again, family communication is important, but it is not always easy. If you feel like there are roadblocks keeping you from healthy, effective communication with your family, you do not have to work through them alone.

Family therapy is a great way to better understand why those roadblocks are there. What caused them, and what can you do about them? You will learn more about your own communication style and needs, and healthy ways to show vulnerability and open up around your family. Feel free to reach out for more information or to set up a consultation soon.